Hope says I will pass through.
Even so, most the time, it feels like a standing still and a sinking down and a gonna drown kind of season. Drudgery and Dreadful thoughts meet me when I think I will pass through. I have to stop and give myself a moment to consider and reconsider and recalibrate the infinite possibilities of stepping out from that place of defeat.
I will pass through.
I say it again – I will pass through.
Hope says I will pass through this valley and then move up the mountain. YES! This is the true voice of expectation and strength and confidence. I have to see myself painted with confidence to maintain the image that will help me stay in peace. I will pass through.
Listen, I know you may be watching others give up. But you can’t give up.
I know you may be watching strugglers straggle. But, you can’t straggle.
You get to make a new decision in the midst of others deciding. You do not have to lean into the voices in their heads.
No, you keep yourself in trust and confidence.
With confidence, say it with me – I will pass through.
At the risk of making you the reader mad – Let me be the minority voice and have my own little ruckus because I’m an unknown woman who grew up on the wrong side of the track whose daddy owned a worm ranch and you know how fun that was to be known as the family with the worms whose nickname was Sewage… You and I both walk this same earth. Yes, I am white so go ahead and presuppose now before you read onward cause I’m sure it’s gonna make somebody mad…cause you know…that seems to be the preferred emotion this day…you know…to get angry instead of a change of mind or actually have a conversation face to face versus on facebook or this device where we do not see the pain in each others eyes and we stay clear of any kind of true compassion for the life we have lived or are now living.
WHY does the sickening hate in American continue to be about racism and not identifying the true issue?
Historically, it seems here in America, we stop and cling to the word racism every time there is any kind of violence against a non-white and then the nation riots (not the first time) and then we have an outcry against racism. If a stand against racism were the answer would it have been resolved by now? The issue is identity in all colors and not just white. We live on this same earth.
Violence was not how Martin Luther King handled his life – that man is a man who crosses all denominational and all economical and all color boundaries. He demonstrated dignity and literally changed society…He knew who He was and Whose. He paid a price for it. He was fearless.
My goodness – Why do you suppose we do not develop past our own skin color? Yes, AGAIN, I acknowledge I’m still white and now some may be protesting from non-white skin and say something like this: “You don’t know what it is like to walk in my shoes…or my mom’s or grandfathers or …….onward…. And you don’t know what it was like to walk in mine either. This country is IMMATURE IN developing respect… for just about anything really when you think about it…. We all want to shift blame to somebody else for why we have a lack of identity. I see the disrespect in the mom for her role as I see her ignore her child while on her phone every single day when she walks the kid around the corner. I see the kids next door completely ignore instructions from their parents. I almost get hit by cars thinking it is cool to race down the highway in rush-hour as they endanger all of us in their competition. I see an entire family including kids on their cell phones at dinner ignoring one another. These are all colors and all ages and all economics. Disrespect for one another is learned. Respect is learned. But lack of love is probably at the core root.
You are right – I don’t know what it was like to walk or what it IS like to walk in your shoes. I was bullied as a kid and as an adult every single day (not tarred and feathered) but continually hit and continually made fun of and was poor and paid for vacations with bottles my parents found on the side of the road so part of me has had some issues maybe some of you did not have…
I grew up under the leadership of an earthly father who felt hitting was the best way to communicate his love language. I grew up with kids who ridiculed me daily and I hated myself with a vengeance most my life… What I experienced is not the same as any-color racism –
ALTHOUGH at the time it tore me apart and almost took my life many times in my lifetime….
Racism is found in all cultures across the globe – cultural prejudice within and outside of all sorts of sects and family lines and cities and nations including inside America.
Yet all of us walk on this same earth.
And honestly, it seems to be white people who stop whatever they are doing to jump up and down to come to the defense of racism more than anyone – is it guilt? Do we want to be popular? Do we want others to think well of us? Do we want more friends? Do we really want to make a difference? Why is the cry for racism only during riots and bloodshed?
If it was really solely a race issue – do you think it could have been resolved by now?
Are you really convinced race is the issue?
COULD it be deeper than race…deeper than skin shade…?
I just wish we had a true strategy to solve this sickening emotion/hatred.
I’m thinking we as a nation – a people – all over the globe – don’t know who we are and we don’t know WHOSE we are and we don’t acknowledge we have the exact same color blood and we breathe the exact same air and we have the same organs. We won’t consider that we all came from the same Spirit and we all return to the same Spirit after we leave this same earth that we all walk on together.
Instead, we use emotions as our excuse for actions and behavior
that belittles, reinforces, dishonors, angers and rules atmospheres…separates, divides, shifts blame and takes blame.
I was thinking today that it is ironic to think the one rioting may be robbing their heavenly neighbor?? Sad to think the one prejudice against that other is having attitude with someone who holds God Already living inside them and living alongside of them and will see them in the next place of existence…until then – we all walk on this same earth.
It is not just us white people who don’t now who we are – it is every color as we walk this same earth.
Screwed Up MESS is what is happening folks.
End of my rant.
Have a great day.
Make a non violent rumble will you?
Let your voice be heard.
But let it be a voice for humanity and not just your section of humanity… because right now we are ALL focused on this one thing…in unity to stop something that we won’t stop by using all these little posts and antics of poopularity…………. 🙂
Be mad. When we are mad, we stop being kind to others AND ourselves…
because that is how the emotion of hate – separation – division – works…
hate is an inside job that shows up on the outside…
If I were not white would you still be mad for me writing this?
LOVE WILL ALWAYS BE THE ANSWER.
Love is an inside job.
Where is our Wisdom as an entire people?
NOT A PASSIVE LOVE.
NOT A COMPLACENT LOVE.
BUT a Union in Love from Love with an origin from ABOVE Who may even live inside of you (even if you have turned to hate God or Higher Power or WHATEVER/WHOMEVER You call the one who gives you breath and blood) So, are we fighting amongst our own brothers and sisters? WHEN REALLY we are all really one color…. ?? Something to think about as we walk this same earth.
Interesting to think we have the same Father … we were all birthed…
You have thoughts? I would love to hear some response from love not hate. So, if you don’t know me, you won’t hear compassion, you won’t see the tears, you won’t care about my heart that cares…
Have you ever known someone who was so broken that their expectancy was zero? I have felt like that before myself and it was a horrible season of not trusting myself, others or God. I was so downtrodden by my own mistakes that I did not expect faith.
I did not expect trust or reliance. I was lost inside myself. Though my Father was right there inside me with great expectation as He talked to me about living life, I could not hear His voice because I had no compass for believing He would talk to me when I felt like my life was nothing.
I want to encourage you today to expect faith.
Hope in God again. Hope in people again. Hope in yourself again. Hope in the sun coming up again.
Expect faith my friend. Expect yourself to trust again. See yourself in your own mind standing up and taking steps.
Every time you sit in a chair – you expect it to hold you.
Every time you set your alarm – you expect it to wake you.
Every time you brush your teeth – you expect those bristles to work.
You DO know how to trust – you just don’t realize it looks and feels as mundane as getting up or breathing air or sitting down.
Expect again my friend.
Breathe in a fresh idea of expectancy.
Hope says to Love yourself without limits. Love yourself. Yes, I am clear. Love yourself.
Listen, one thing I know is I have made a bucket filled with mistakes. I have made people mad. I have disappointed others. I have unknowingly betrayed and been betrayed. I have lived in pain and fear and dread and thought I would die. Nobody said – love yourself.
I was directed to love God. Yet, loving God was not my answer. Don’t shoot me. HE already loves me. YES, I need to love Him. But, if we love Him … that does not mean we love ourselves. So, I’m telling you right now in the midst of all the junk going on in your private world where nobody sees and you don’t want anybody to see – love yourself.
Being loved by God is the way to finding the key to loving yourself.
It took me years to embrace the reality that Someone would Love me unconditionally without getting cleaned up or perfect. People wanted me perfect. I got beat upside the head countless times as a kid for not doing anything right. I get it. I never felt good enough because those family members and friends did not feel good enough either. Love yourself.
It is possible. I did it. It took what seems a lifetime but I did go through the process to determine my own worth and my own value in the midst of others not loving me. Whether you start young or old – learn to love yourself. One day at a time – love yourself.
Take yourself on a journey. Take yourself by the hand and woo yourself into true unconditional LOVE FOR YOU.
Guest Writer – Sandy Lee Nelson – GRIEF is NOT an emotion that only comes from death. Social Media is flooded with posts about how one can never know or comprehend grief until you lose a child, or until a child loses a parent, or until you lose a husband or a wife, or an entire family. Those who say, think and believe this are incorrect.
Grief does not ALWAYS come from death. Joy comes in the morning.
Grief KNOWS me. For many, many years my grief was buried deep, deep inside of me and it would visit me and devour me like a Brown Recluse Spider bite devours your skin. It was a deep dark secret that I kept on the inside. It robbed me of my childhood, my teenage years and a good portion of my adult life. It not only robbed me but it robbed my family as well. I KNOW grief.
The grief I am speaking of was passed down generationally thru our family’s bloodline. I did not choose it. It was chosen for me. I came into agreement with it and entered into it when I was conceived. It was with me on the day of my birth. It became part of what I thought was my identity. Yet, joy comes in the morning.
My 65th birthday is approaching and I have spent some of this pandemic time reflecting on where I have been, where I am now and where I am going.
I am so blessed that somewhere along my life’s journey I was awakened to the presence of my creator. I have a loving Abba Father who is in the restoration business. Even though I couldn’t feel it. Even though I couldn’t see it. He was constantly working on me. He was continually reaching inside to the deepest, darkest depth of my soul and revealing this grief to me. He walked me thru the process of self examination. He showed me my selfish, self righteous self. He gave me time to see it, admit it, repent of it. He watched me lay it down. He made sure that I didn’t leave any bitter roots behind. He restored that place with His Joy and I learned joy comes in the morning..
Oh…my carnal brain can and still does go back there sometimes, but He is always faithful to remind me that WHO I am now is not WHO I was then.
Yes. Joy still comes in the morning! Hope still walks with the hurting. I am alive and breathing and I Praise The Lord!
Hope says He is my security even when I run circles with Voices in my head. What about the voices in your head?
Oh, but it does not feel like that does not? Sometimes the storm inside is so full of voices and thoughts and ideas that you think you’re going crazy. Yet, there is One Who is not in favor of you going cray cray. Nope, They want you to lean into Them for security and stability. Father, Son and Spirit are standing strong and still as you run circles. Oh, They speak but They speak in calm not fury. Maybe you are so accustomed to the swirls that you don’t see or discern the Peace available in the midst of voices in your head.
It is like you feel attacked by birds of prey and you feel like there is no use to pray.
Yet, God is there – waiting to capture your heart and set you in a new way.
Stop and be still and hear His heartbeat instead.Do not be afraid of the voices in your head.
A season like no other being tested as great, mighty or ?. A time that tests the fibers of your very core. It was not too long before I had a pretty rude awakening on my weaknesses in a clear and upfront way. I’m seeing that if it can be squeezed, its being squeezed. If the trigger can be triggered – its triggered. If its wine time, then I may be the grapes being used to crush. I vacillate between the great and mighty woman of faith I am already to the girl on the floor on her knees reminding God of her existence and … gulp- her needs. Physical needs sometimes seem overwhelming but so do emotional and mental needs. I’ve been the one who believed for those who had no belief in themselves. I’ve been the one who help the hand of the one who wanted to say goodbye to their life. I remember the stricken look in the eyes of paying and non paying clients who wanted and needed a line of strength or they literally thought they would not make it. I remember those comments of not wanting to wake up or not seeing a Reason to get up or basically a desire to check out and stay checked out. I believed when they did not. What is my point? Great or Mighty or?
I know what it feels like to believe for someone’s life as if their life depended on it – because it did depend on it. I saw them through crisis after crisis after crisis and then they changed and no longer needed me to hold their hand or they found someone else to hold it perhaps.
Interesting season when you face the need for your own faith to be there for your own life and not the belief for the life of someone else’s. It takes every fiber in your being to stay focused, to stay engaged and to not falter as you determine how to live. Great or mighty or ?
It is a strong season or is it? I don’t fully disclose what my life faces right now and others do not either. Some friends have diseases that threaten their lives, job losses threaten their shelter, treatments coming for folks who would have rather experienced the supernatural miracle, viruses overwhelming a body, bacteria wanting to rule an immune system, weakness wanting to take an elder down and isolation tearing some apart. The list goes on.
Remember Who lives inside you and remember His Good news for you. Remember and focus on the good. When the bad overtakes – remember you are disciplining yourself in a new way today. You are rewiring your brain.Its a new beginning. A new foundation. A new opportunity to love and be loved, to be kind and to listen with your heart and not your ears. Oh, this is the test for me for sure. Listening with His perspective – this is how we endure this season and how we live through it and come out better. You asked for transformation – and now it has arrived. Know you are loved and you are great and mighty. Love,d
I want to talk about the power of intention. Taking hold of your thoughts… Capturing your thoughts… It’s done intentionally. It is not a random act of kindness. It is the power of intention.
It is an intentional action on the inside of you that captures an ill willed thought and stops it from moving out of you. An intention that stops it from entering into the space of another human being. An intention stopping it from being against yourself. Pause. Think about your thoughts and then about your intention.
If you find yourself entertaining an unkind thought, impression or idea toward you or another person… Stop and reconsider. Picture yourself snatching it up with your hands … and throwing it into a trashcan. Cancel that thought. Look at that thought in your mind and put a great big X Mark on top of it. Canceled. Denied. Reject it from living inside you. Cancel that thought from going after another person. You have the power of intention.
Intention is powerful. What can you think instead? Choose a new thought. Blessing. Potential. Compassion. Let’s be intentionally kind toward ourselves and toward others and let’s rock on with the Love of God.
You have the power of #intention with Love, d #jesus #prayer #splankna
Seriously, I know it is hard to find a message in a pile of dirty clothes, a garage full of crap, an attic with your past or a relationship gone wrong. However, every mess has a message.
It is finding the message – it is finding clarity in the midst of confusion – finding strength in the midst of weakness – finding yourself in the midst of the voices. Finding Truth in the fear.
Being quarantined will bring everything that is out of whack into glaring clarity. It’s an intentional time to be purposeful with what you see around you. Every mess has a message.
You might feel overwhelmed your life is a mess or the need feels so great.
Take one thing at a time. Do what you can to be intentional. Use what you have. Take care of your own business while you can… because this will end and then the mess you did not take time for now gets to live longer…
Ideas: clean out your closet, gather old clothes for give away, clean out attic or garage, clean bedroom or bathroom. Organize kitchen cabinet.
The list goes on. Or maybe you have avoided something for years and now it’s time to tackle it?
Today I’m perusing old papers and organizing a file cabinet. I’m confident that mess will hold a message for me too.