Change is a process. We want a silver bullet but it is all about the process. It’s called renewing the mind. It’s not a one time event. You don’t expose lies and vows and change into a different person like magic. You take bite after bite into the lies of who you have thought yourself to be and you let yourself make new decisions as you unfold who God says you have already BECOME. Be patient with you as you let yourself become the brand new you. Be kind to those around you in their process too.
You get to look change in the eye with courage and confidence and kindness and eventually realize your worldview has changed. You have gone through the process of thinking differently – toward yourself and those surrounding you – one decision at a time. Love-d
New book not just new chapter. Listen maybe it’s time to shut the book you are living from and start a new one. Why rehash chapter after chapter while getting the same ending every time? You have the wherewithal and power to listen to The Voice of The Greatest Teacher Who will ever live and walk into your LOVE given destiny. Don’t wait another second. Pause. Recalibrate. Let go of the past, the future and what you thought and grab hold of the thought from heaven for you and those in your influence. Don’t think for one moment that you walk alone. Don’t think for one moment that you have no impact on society. You ARE IMPACT. #bebraver Take action. Get strategy and get going. Don’t worry about where you will end up – just think about moving in sync with LOVE Who thinks about you day and night – night and day – and Whose plan is Mission Possible. See you on the other side of the past and see you in the new book signed by LOVE. I love you @donnareiners #bravetobraver
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When I woke up this morning I had a most definite feeling of alone-ness. Almost empty really. It was almost overwhelming as I pondered my day…alone was in front of me and to be honest I normally do not mind…the alone part. However, for some reason I sidestepped the invitation into silence.
I stopped to listen and got no inspiration or understanding. Instead, I slipped into memories of my younger years when my responsibilities were deciding what movie I wanted to go see or what outfit I would wear or who I was going to meet or what I would do with the leftover in my check after I paid my car note which at the time was about a hundred dollars. Those were the days!
We have a LACK of Silence
Silence is an interesting word and an interesting condition of the heart. Some would even venture to say that silence is boring and to be honest, I believe that is the worn out norm for many generations. Think of the lack of silence that penetrates our days. Elevators have music to captivate your short attention on the way to your floor. Every doctor and dental office has music to drown out the confidential dialogues happening with patients. Frequently, you’ll find music flooding the department stores and grocery stores that keep you happy and energetic. More often than not it is very difficult to locate a restaurant that will allow you to have thoughtful conversation without some sort of musical ambiance to set the stage. None of this yet mentions our ability to keep our ears on overload with music or teaching through our very smart phones which are loaded up with every variety of sound available to man except perhaps – silence.
What’s my challenge today? GET QUIET! Be unafraid of silence. Turn off the radio, CD player and IPOD in your car for a week. Spend a day without tv. Try something new….enjoy YOU….the unfiltered you….the you without props and find out you are AWESOME without all that jazz……..adding noise to your mind and heart.
A video to see if you don’t like to read OR a video to see WITH the read…
This is the deal. We have an entire generation (this is NOT age specific) of men and women who think they are impervious to aging or needing others or mishaps that take your life into another direction than what you are believing God for…you know…that million dollar job where you are care free or that dream vacation life where you have zero responsibilities…not to mention marrying this person or that person and spending all your precious time with someone who may not have the stamina to love you if your bowels loose on them. Let me just say that money does not buy you happiness and does not turn back the wheels of time. Sure, you can slow down the wrinkles, draw back the skin, remove the fat and basically redo your body from top to toe but it does not make your insides healthy. Remember that song…I think by MC Hammer???, “Can’t Touch This…”
Life happens people. Life DOES touch us…You can either yell about it and bitch and moan and complain (I know I said the B word and I’ll probably get a WHOLE lot of flack) or you can put your big girl/boy undies on and face reality and live life as it comes to you instead of avoid it like the plague. It is our response to our life that determines our futures with one another. I saw a lady at the pet store yesterday who was talking about having to care for her 85 year old mother who is still mobile but living with her. She was not bitter and I was thankful but I could tell she had not yet grabbed hold that God had entrusted her with her mom and that it is her honor to love her on this side of heaven. For those who have walked with me for a season, you may remember the passing of our sister Mary Ann who needed a great deal more than I was physically capable of providing – she lived in a nursing facility. I saw her frequently and I gotta say it was inconvenient many of the time since she was 45 minutes away. However, it truly was an honor to love her while she was on this side of heaven and now that she is no longer available to touch, call or hear, it is amazing how UN-inconvenient she really was in real time. I can’t bring her back and it never worked…this whole attitude of can’t touch this.
What are you doing with the ones who live with you or are your aging family members or aging friends? You NEED TO TOUCH THEM! I remember Dad and how he needed our love as a family and how we leaned how to honor him and how God changed ALL OF US in the process. Honor is an action word and it sooooo encouraged my dad to BE LOVED!!!! It also encouraged us to love him. Tomorrow does not always come. Aging. Do I mean someone in their 80’s? No. I’m saying look around for goodness sake. Do you have a mom or a dad? Do you have a step mom or a step dad? Do you have siblings? Do you have aunts and uncles? Do you have nieces and nephews? What about friends who you consider family? How about your neighbor? When is the last time you loved them face to face? Watched a movie with them? Had dinner? Laughed over some jokes? Held their hand? Hugged their neck? Wiped their behind? Yes, I went there…don’t worry…you will survive.
It’s time to love while it is still called today. #BEBRAVER – Love is an action word. No you cannot run all over tarnation (my mama used that word when I was a kid.) BUT you can look into your life and see one person whom you can love. She or he may be in your same house. Don’t ignore those closest to you and don’t run away from the ones you want to run from….may be that there is a strong life lesson OR a whole lot of love in that person for you…if you can look through their tone and look into their need AND IGNORE that whole feeling of can’t touch this…
So, I was talking to a mom the other day who never sees her grow up adult kid. Now, I know this mom and they spent lots of time being there for their kid when they were young – all the sports games – took them lunch when they forgot it – took them their books when they so forgot them in the car – made sure the uniforms were clean – got them back and forth to school, to games, to friends, to…well…you name it. Fast forward – kid is now in the 20 something age. Guess what? Kid is soooo busy becoming a mature adult that there is no time to visit parents who are still alive and cognizant of their name and presence. This is not maturity – this is selfishness and lack of consideration. I’m calling it immature boundaries.
Side rant – maybe your parents were selfish and were not there for you AT ALL……..I’m sorry………but you still get to mature and be the better person………
Back to point – If your parent or those that represent your parents have to ask you to visit them…then maybe you do need a reminder. If you have a parent nonchalantly asking to see you – maybe you need to employ a little thing called HONOR and get your butt over there more often and spend time with the one who spent time with you doing all the things you wanted to do when you were a selfish little kid whose life was ALL ABOUT YOU.
Ok – so perhaps you have left your safe nest and live on your own and think you have the right to live however you want. Really? You think they took the right to live however THEY WANTED when they went to every one of your games, got your hair cut, clothes purchased, etc..?? Listen…I know a dad who told me…that’s just part of it. Really? Letting a kid who now is on their own and paying their own bills run all over you and not willing to do a simple task for you is not supposed to be part of it.
Seriously…the parents may have had better things to do but they felt the better thing was to do for the kid.
Now I want to tell you my mom died when I was 17…..it would be an honor to have a time to be with her now..in her 90’s. I’m gonna want someone to love me when I’m oldER. How about you?
So, word to the young one – whether you are 20 going on 10 or 30 or 40 or 50 or ……you get the picture – How about you be mature and plan time to give back your own time, energy, finances and resources. Why don’t you choose this time to grow up….instead of thinking you are all grown up and you should not have to do anything you don’t want to……….like an immature child…why not try giving back…..you never know…you might even find your parents are your best friends….maybe not all the time…but hey…be who you wanted them to be even if they can’t be that yet…or ever. Be the bigger person. Always. Refuse to have immature boundaries.
And if your heart is just not into it and you just cannot fathom going to see your parents or those who consider themselves as your parents then I got to say…………….you NOT seeing them……..is worse than their behavior because what they did in ignorance – you now do on purpose.
Nothing but love for you – but its time to #BEBRAVER and LOVE on purpose.
Here I sit in a Starbucks keenly aware of my surroundings. The scurry of activity makes even my ADD move to a different level. I can see above each person’s head a story, a need, a history, a song, a calling and a life untold and unlived unbeknownst to them. What if the answer to your question was in the heart of the woman or man to the left or right of you? You are in the grocery store to get your food for the week but your insides are hurting because you have a need. Look up – the solution could be in front of you but first you may have to get off your high horse.
Need is Scary
What on earth could I mean? Need – its a strong and scary word for most. Yet we each experience it in various ways. Along with the word need comes words like responsibility, inconvenience and TIME. Perspective is everything and this is where the lines get a bit blurry. One one hand a person thinks they have no needs and therefore has no need of anyone so why be involved in taking responsibility in the lives of others? Be careful on that high horse. On the other hand you have a person who may have needs but tells no one out of fear of inconveniencing others so they remain silent. Be careful on that high horse. Maybe someone has needs and tells the world and monopolizes everyone’s time to the extent that they wear out their welcome because they feel entitlement. That too can be from the station of a high horse. Life from a high horse can look different for each person involved.
Before a Fall
All of us can have a bend in the kind of pride that comes before a fall. What if you live your life as if it is not your own? God is smart and if we would simply let Him be God then your call into responsibility in my life can be filled with joy and my call to be inconvenienced with your issues can be filled with joy and both our calls to have our time consumed with others can also be our joy.
What is it that brings a Christian life into self? Could it be looking at the needs of others as if they are less than instead of different? Have you not yet experienced the drudgery of responsibility, inconvenience or giving your time? If you have not – then you will and if you have already and think you will escape its clutches in the future – good luck with that kind of attitude. If you belong to the One Who died and lives then isn’t it His call as to how you spend your time or live your life? Why judge me as if my actions are less than yours or yours are greater or bigger than mine? If I keep my eyes on you then my perspective is already skewed. In the big corporate picture – we belong to a Father Who manages the microscopic and the macroscopic and both are equally important.
So, today’s encouragement is to simply be BRAVE enough to obey God right where you are and to pardon the visual – BOLDLY get off your high horse. If you think your business is bigger or better or even LESS than someone else, then gain a new RESPECT and take ACTION to be loving through HIS VICTORY. ENCOURAGE yourself and those around you because its God’s business and ALL HIS business is BIG business. Honestly, HE is the only One Who never changes and HE has the highest perspective available.
Would you do me a favor? Would you please take a second to FORWARD this to three friends whom you want to encourage and then tell me here about it?
Please also SHARE this on your Facebook and/or Twitter.
If this speaks to you – would you please reply and let me know? Let’s encourage one another. Let’s be a pathway of strength for each other through spring, summer, fall or winter – until next time –
Have you ever heard the public confession of a private extrovert?
Crazy huh? Well, let me tell you my story. So, one year I went back to the gym – as in I got a trainer and everything and this is after being out of the game for YEARS. My first day was of course amazing and it was not until two days later I discovered I could barely walk for the pain in my thighs from the new pressure I had exerted. Needless to say that the pain did not deter me as I was determined to move forward and I was consistent and diligent for 4 months. I was faithful to endure 2 workouts with a trainer per week and I worked out almost daily with just a few exceptions for appointments, exhaustion, family, etc. THEN, I had a moment of WAH!LAH! I made my confession that I could do this and thought I could be private at home and do this gym gig by myself. After all I’m doing GREAT! Surely, I do not have to be public in the gym to get my health back! Right? I was brave and took action. I purchased weights for 50 cents a pound, got one of those big honkin’ inflated work out balls from an expert, found some elastic bands for my arms, purchased a floor mat and even got an inexpensive treadmill. My confession made me go all out! I had been writing down all the exercises and just knew I would be able to be the same person at home that I was at the gym. I was OFF to the races or so I thought… After two months with only one workout to my credit I had a revelation with a new confession. My new confession was that I HATE being alone. Seriously? How can this be? FOR YEARS and I mean years my publicconfession of me not being an extrovert. I have exclaimed from the roof tops that I am an introvert! I have told myself and the world just how much I love my solitude and how I can handle just so much of people. What was wrong with me? Now, let’s fast forward into reality and hear the public confession of a private extrovert.
Why was I unsuccessful as an introvert?
So, I was UNSUCCESSFUL at working out alone as an introvert. WHY? Because I need people! Oh my goodness when the lightbulb went on I thought I was losing my mind. I looked back and carefully considered my steps. How can I be an extrovert? I love solitude. I like just being with me-I mean I really do-in all my quirky funky dressing talking humor I genuinely enjoy myself. Also, I’m pretty brave in how I approach life. However, as I bravely reviewed my true reality, I rehearsed in my mind all the times I spend alone. Then, I truly stared into how unfruitful my time was when completely alone at home or in a room locked away or even on a retreat by myself. On the other hand, I looked a how my productivity was when I picked up my computer and found public WiFi at St. Arbucks and remained there for HOURS just writing and talking and using my cell phone and calendaring my day and making appointments and making new friends. Again, now I’m making a public confession and I’m ready to add fuel to the fire for a bit of transparency.
What is the point?
Would you like to know when I get the most done in my own home? It is when someone is on the way over and I scramble to make sure the house is picked up or move quickly to create a fun meal for us. All of a sudden I am completely inspired to clean my office or garage and I find myself getting much done when they are here with me because I love to work with others. I know folks who get a thousand things done all alone so that they can go out and play. However, for me, I get a thousand things done when others come over to play! The point is that all these years I thought I was an introvert because I saw a program talking about textbook introverts and how they process all their information inside themselves and I realized how ME THAT WAS! I truly do take my thoughts on the inside. I consider life and God and I prayerfully and thoughtfully peer into situations and processes. Anyway, for my social well being and for my family’s well being I have come to the radical understanding that if I am not around people I am not a happy camper and if I’m not a happy camper….then no one in my home is happy either and that basically makes me a social extrovert………..with introvert tendencies. Crazy as it might sound…this little inspiration or revelation has helped me tremendously to get organized and to make sure I have more people contact and to recognize that if I’m feeling a bit blue or borderline depressed then more than likely its not because I’m sad or depressed or blue or anything else. Therefore, part of my public confession is that when I’m feeling a little lonely, all I need is a public shot of social interaction and then I’m back to being my same old funky quirky talk your ear off friend whom you can’t live without. LOL
How to be brave in your own story
Be Brave. Be bold regarding who you are today and who you want to be tomorrow. Read here another story about how I had to be brave in my identity. Show respect to yourself and get to know yourself. Take action my friend! You can move into the real you! You are victorious so do not let the voices in your head get you going down a wrong way street! Lastly be encouraged and you can right any mistake you have made regarding how you live life. Be Brave and thought it might take time – you are worth it!You are who you are so why not learn from my error of attempting to become someone I’m not. Just be you. Be you. Be the best you that you can be and learn how to rejoice in how God made you. God’s not mad at you and HE is not mad at me. HE rejoices over how HE made us and we should rejoice over how HE made us too….
Be sure and reply and let me hear from you! Be brave because I want to know if you have a public confession of a private extrovert!