I’ve been thinking a lot about boundaries – we got books galore on the subject. We teach people how to have them, how to keep them and how to teach others how to have and keep them. So, I get it – some people get on your nerves. They push your buttons and they tick you off and you are just sick of it or maybe they are one of those who manipulate and control you with their words of guilt, loneliness and need. So, to keep yourself from getting mad at their obvious blind spot of sin and witchcraft – you employ this amazing BUZZWORD: Boundaries.
Really? So, maybe you just don’t know how to speak the truth in love OR they can’t receive the truth you speak in love. Maybe. I hear you.
OR you just don’t like your buttons pushed. How about that? How about you are so busy pointing the finger to that person or that church or that group or that old person or that young person….wrapping your thoughts about how they dare to try and tell you what to do or manipulate you into visiting them or helping them or whatever……you are soooooooo busy thinking how wrong THEY ARE and how BLIND THEY ARE that you are BLIND TO YOUR OWN WRONG DOING. Oh yea.
I went there. I went there with me first. Now I go there with you.
I have a short video for you to watch before you read my blog……………its a sneak peak into today’s BUZZWORD BOUNDARIES
Back to my ranting – so, this is what I think and you can spit in my eye if you want. I think MOST….maybe not all…but most the time we implement boundaries to protect our own little hot buttons….to protect that area we have walled off as forbidden territory…to protect….to keep our anger in a fortress whereby no one can enter unless they have the magic words (RAPUNZEL LET DOWN YOUR HAIR!)…………OR protect our sadness or mourning or grieving….so as to keep it inside where nobody knows we are in pain. Face it. When we help a person who cannot help themselves and it only brings up emotions of the last time we helped a user…I mean a helpless person….it just makes us think we are being used.
But are we?
SURE WE ARE!!! Jesus was used all the time and you and I are in really good company….HE says to live like HE lived…
If someone brings out the worst in you…………..THEY AIN’T THE ISSUE. If it’s not in you – it won’t come out REGARDLESS OF who they are or what they do to you. IF IT’S IN YOU……………….THEN THAT’S THE REAL DILLY BOB.
So, my advice? Not that you asked for it…but since you did……………when someone makes you mad or sad or you feel manipulated or controlled or guilt ridden???? Instead of cutting them off with your flesh driven protect myself from killing them or myself boundaries and making them the problem or the cause…how about making a fresh observation on your own character and your own issues and your own undealtwith problems?
The real deal is that if you are able to be manipulated – that’s not their bad – that’s yours. The real deal is that if they can cause you to feel guilt or condemnation – that’s not their bad – that is yours. You get to thank GOD HE is revealing to you something about your spirit or soul that would otherwise not be known…had it not for that precious friend who pushed all your flippin buttons.
SELAH. Quit blaming others for what’s inside of you. When you create boundaries just for boundaries sake…ask yourself…are you protecting YOU or protecting that part of you that you don’t want coming out…cause you embarrass yourself when you yell, scream, get angry or frustrated or cry. Listen…we are all in a test. Its the HOPE test. If you are truly HOLDING ONTO PAPA EXPECTANTLY then you won’t blow your lid or protect your rights……….you will instead run to the wilderness and spend time with God the Father and get filled up or REMAIN filled up. HOW ON THIS EARTH DID JESUS stay in relationship with His disciples? HE spent time with the Father…HE slipped away to be with HIM when nobody else was around….HE REMAINED filled so that HE COULD ALWAYS GIVE OUT WHAT HIS DAD WAS DOING AND WHAT HIS DAD WAS SAYING.
Question is – do you want to be like Dad and do the right thing……..or do you want to be like you….and never change.
Send to a friend…
Love you – until next time..